Thursday, April 9, 2009

What's on my mind today?? A million things as usual...so many things to get done before josh leaves..

He is still working his job as a mechanic at the armory in ravenna 4 days a week 10 hours a day. so that leaves 3 more weekends to get things done and visit everyone that we want to before he leaves. Well this weekend is Easter. Saturday we are going easter shopping for the kids. Which apparently the "easter bunny" visited my mom's house in florida because she shipped 3 big boxes of stuff for Kohen and Kaelyn. Sunday we are going to do our own easter festivities and then head over to my grandma's house around 2.

Monday Josh wants to complete his obsessions of tattoos and get 2 more. We also have to go and get a military ID card for Kohen and I. That way we can get full military benefits while he is gone such as medical and shopping..discounts..among other things.

Next weekend we are going to his dad's house all day saturday to spend time with his dad, stepmom. and little sister. Sunday is Alicia's house warming party..

The weekend of the 25th and 26th, the family and I are attending an informational meeting for the families of soldiers being deployed...that night we are supposed to have josh's going away party..the next day my dad and my stepmom are having a steak dinner for josh and immediate family. BUSY BUSY!!!

So much to think about.. other things that HAVE to get done before he leaves is general power of attorney and we are able to get a 6% interest rate on our car loan while he is deployed (AWESOME!) so we have to submit the papers for that. The kids and I get full benefits (health wise) while he is gone with tricare so we have to find a family doctor that accepts that. From what I hear the benefits are amazing. (duh it's the government!)

We REALLY want to buy a house when he gets back. and since everything he makes over there is tax free I want to use that extra money to pay off our debt and put a little aside each month for our down payment. as of right now I can't even get a prepaid visa card (lol j/k but you get the point..) I want to have at least 10,000 saved up within the year and a half for a down payment for a house.

So..I have also been making plans for things to do while he is gone...
I HAVE to quit smoking..it's killing me..literally... and I want to lose weight. at least 10 lbs. My face and stomach both look totally fat. Others might slap me in the face for thinking this way but I have always been tiny and I prefer myself that way. I'm not going crazy and losing like 20 lbs or anything but I know I could be more in shape. I want to start excercising and eating healthy. especially if I am going to florida this summer... this postpreggo body is NOT going into a bathing suit... with the first 2 kids the weight just kinda shed off.. but it seems like I am getting fatter by the day...of course the extra calories from drinking beer isn't helping lol

alright well, as usual..the baby keeps crying and kohen is driving me nuts...

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Dedicated to my hero..my husband

OH, WHY YOU LOOK SO SAD?
TEARS ARE IN YOUR EYES
COME ON AND COME TO ME NOW
DON'T BE ASHAMED TO CRY
LET ME SEE YOU THROUGH
'CAUSE I'VE SEEN THE DARK SIDE TOO

WHEN THE NIGHT FALLS ON YOU
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
NOTHING YOU CONFESS
COULD MAKE ME LOVE YOU LESS
I'LL STAND BY YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
WON'T LET NOBODY HURT YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
SO IF YOU'RE MAD, GET MAD
DON'T HOLD IT ALL INSIDE
COME ON AND TALK TO ME NOW

HEY, WHAT YOU GOT TO HIDE?
I GET ANGRY TOO
WELL I'M A LOT LIKE YOU

WHEN YOU'RE STANDING AT THE CROSSROADS
AND DON'T KNOW WHICH PATH TO CHOOSE
LET ME COME ALONG
'CAUSE EVEN IF YOU'RE WRONG
I'LL STAND BY YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
WON'T LET NOBODY HURT YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU

TAKE ME IN, INTO YOUR DARKEST HOUR
AND I'LL NEVER DESERT YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
AND WHEN...
WHEN THE NIGHT FALLS ON YOU, BABY
YOU'RE FEELING ALL ALONE
YOU WON'T BE ON YOUR OWN
I'LL STAND BY YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
WON'T LET NOBODY HURT YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
TAKE ME IN, INTO YOUR DARKEST HOUR
AND I'LL NEVER DESERT YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU
I'LL STAND BY YOU

Sunday, April 5, 2009

video

Yeah so I already had a sappy morning.. See above.. Yet again..not going to jump into that topic or my blog would be 10 pages long..my heart is still aching...
ANYWAY...
So...I finally finished backing up my pictures onto cds, which I have been meaning to do for a long time now. I just got scared considering my microwave, washer, and two (yes 2) tvs are broken.. didn't want a computer disaster to wipe out all of my much needed memories..

The countdown begins..and no not a happy one..27 days til josh starts training to go to iraq. I think I have just been puting off thinking about it because it still doesn't seem real. Just like when he left for 5 months for basic and AIT.. it didn't hit me until the drive home that I wouldn't be seeing him for a while. and yes, those 5 months seemed like an eternity, I can only image how long the next year and a half will feel like..

I know I can take care of the kids, bills, etc...but I just worry about him. Kohen's 5th birthday..him going to preschool..kaelyn's first birthday..first words..walking.. he missed all of it with carter and I swore he wouldn't go through that again..well here we are...

There is also the fact that he is going to WAR..can't ignore that fact.. I don't even want to think about what would happen if he didn't make it home..I'm praying for the best..

"Praying".. Okay, this is one topic I can't ignore... I have ALWAYS been religious..and I DO believe in God..I just unfortunately doubt his motives.. which is not exactly the thing I should be thinking if I want to go to heaven and see my precious baby boy again...but I'm sure someday..(NOT NOW)..I will forgive him for taking Carter away from me..cuz it sure as hell doesn't make any sense to me..

ALRIGHT...I said I wasn't getting into that today... ANYWAYS.. You would think that since Kohen now has his own little dwelling with all of his toys that he would be super excited...NOPE still biting at my ankles...see yesterday's post about my ongoing insanity...

So..the fighter group called me a couple days ago and asked me if I could work monday and tuesday so knowing that we need the extra money I made arrangements to work the two days... it's only 5 hours both days..not much but at least I will get out of the house AND make enough to pay the difference on our washer..or fix the tv..or buy a new microwave...haven't decided yet... even though I make good money josh referred to it as "chump change" and that it wasn't worth working those 2 days.. which is his way of saying I love and you and would rather you stay home and spend time with me before I leave... well at least that's what i'm trying to hear..

is that enough mindless rambling? yeah I think so..at least for today...